The, I don't know-several ton I guess, boxcar swings
slowly, in that way that huge things swing when suspended. It's
making headway through the air underneath an unseen helicopter.
The boxcar is trussed up in a diaper of wire rope or webbing that
cinches up (uncomfortably?) between its trucks, and a wheel spins
so slowly that it might be better to say it rotates. The helicopter
is heading east, inland under the darkening clouds. That's assuming
the same clouds are found inland, I don't know. The clouds here,
as the boxcar ascends in its diaper, give the whole affair a mood.
Something like a family member leaving after a stay for a holiday.
A family member you don't really even know that well anymore,
but who represents something or reminds you of something, a time
or a place like this afternoon with the boxcar flying out under
the dark clouds, a feeling. Yes, it's neither a time nor a place,
but a feeling. Though I can't say that a feeling is anything more
than a time and a place remembered. But this thing here on the
shore, watching the segment of the train depart, is like a thing
that happens to people. It's metaphorical, or allegorical or just
evocative or maybe not. Maybe I would find that anything would
make me feel like this today. Maybe it's deja vu without the memory.
Because the memory's been overwritten by too many rememberings
evoked by things like this one, equally indeterminate or random,
if those words mean the same thing. But now the boxcar, the primer
red boxcar, is nearly gone. It has almost reached the same granularity
as the sky, and I have to find it sidelong, with my peripheral
vision. No one else here is doing this. They've gone on down the
beach, searching. But I look sidelong, moving my head, waiting
for it to be gone, in a kind of constant scanning. I can't see
color this way, but I can kind of see the boxcar. Its color has
gone on ahead of it. If you could see me, I would look blind.
Someone down the beach says something, but from the tone I know
it's nothing. I keep on looking. Now I can't see it.